My Medium account reached 1K followers yesterday! Then, someone I had a situationship with sent me a cheerful message about how much they loved my writing. Even though it's been 5 years since the situationship ended, I still feel a quick chill when I see their message in my inbox. Sarcastically, do you know what their previous message was?
"Why don't you try it yourself first? It's a bit like a free-rider."
Yes, it was super mean and aggressive. That's how our situationship went. They had a lot of issues. I would either be scolded or ghosted whenever they weren't satisfied. But today, as if nothing happened, they tell me, "Really love your blog!"
However, instead of feeling the sadness and anger I had before, I just don't know how to respond. Should I be nice to them because it's been a few years? Should I be friendly or even offer to meet up because they might have changed? Am I considered petty if I'm not being nice? But to be fair, they owed me in this lifetime too. I have all the right on this planet to exercise my will. How does the past, which seems so distant, influence the present moment when it feels so disconnected?
My instinctive self wanted me to reply and continue our conversation, but I decided to put it aside for a few days and see if I would have better judgment.
Side track when waiting for a few day: Looking at this small incident, it's funny to see how the world changes. I used to be the simping girl, desperately wanting their attention while being ghosted. My opinions weren't valued, and I was constantly made to feel wrong. But today, they reached out to me and said they love my thought process.
In the end, I decided to react with an emoji but not respond. Even though there was a lot of excitement and potential for more if I responded properly, it's no longer my priority. So less is better.
As a constantly changing and growing person, I want the past to stay in the past. Unless they're good enough, they don't have the right to block my present or my future.